Can.You.Read.My.Mind?



Entries for February, 2005

February 6, 2005
Ka-plop
POSTED AT 02:41 AM

"Sabi nila parang gulong ang buhay...pero..flat yata ang gulong ko. Kasi naman...masyadong mabilis ang ikot..."

Yes the highs and lows of my life come and go very quickly. Just one moment I feel like flying, then I feel like dying on the next. And now I'm stuck underneath, with no clue how long I'm staying here. Bleh.

This week had been...horrible. Prelim exams were given. Pulled three all nighters once more. I really, truly tried to undertand and appreciate Chemistry but...for the life of me I just couldn't. Both my mind and my body are exhausted now. And then, to top it all off, I saw Ran-Ai with Tarsier. Things seem to be going well for them, and terrible for me. Damn. After I thought we were making progress. (Moving on to human touch, yeah boy. We're starting to become more comfy with each other na kasi.)

I've been feeling so down since then. I think I'm starting to drive the Benchers crazy with all my ranting and mood swings. I couldn't help it. I was so down, I couldn't laugh. My God, that's how depressed I was. Imagine, me, Chenyl, not laughing. whooooaa... I'm a little better now. I just hope it lasts.

On the upside though...Tito Nonie's going back to the States this Tuesday. Err..no that's not the good news yet. Anyway, we barely had the chance to hang out, so he gave us some pocketmoney last week. At walanghiya, hindi pa nakuntento. Before we had our family dinner last night, he took us shopping. SHOPPING! For CLOTHES! I effing LOVE clothes! And I think I'm either slimming down or the sizes in Ensembles and Details are bigger. I usually get clothes in Medium and Large. In Ensembles and Details, I fit easily into Small, and sometimes even in Extra Small. Damn....Clothes shopping does wonders for my mood swings and my self-esteem. Ehe.

That's it for now. Will update later.

Ciao.


cast a spell?

February 6, 2005
This one's for you, RanAi
POSTED AT 02:57 AM

Unremarkable

She has the face of a headless statue
Of a faded painting
The type whose features you wouldn’t
Give a second glance
One you’d easily forget without meaning to
One whose fashion choices
Rival those of a lamp post’s
(Understandable though
Given the fact that
She has the body of one)

She’s about as deep as
The flood in our bathroom
When someone forgets to use the shower curtain
As talented as toy
That’s been winded too much
As pleasing as a toddler
Who whines for attention every moment she gets

She has nothing that can rouse one’s interest
Unless it’s interest of the negative sort.
She has nothing of any worth

…

Oh. Right.

She has you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: Yes, I know I'm evil. Get over it.


cast a spell?

February 18, 2005
Weekender
POSTED AT 03:03 PM

Of course my Vday sucked. New Year pa lang I knew it would suck, big time. Yeah I got flowers and stuff. Greetings. Though it was really sweet of my friends to give me sumthin, none of them really mattered....none of 'em came from him.

Oh well.

Week's been pretty hectic for my school life. Assignments, quizzes, activities, extracurriculars....bleh...the usuals. Got 92 for my Pinoy project (the one where we were supposed to translate an English song and sing it in front of everyone), and another 92 for our Theology group project. No need to remind anyone what the number of the week is, ne?

On the upside though, Buen's talking to me again. Hooray.

Won my first volleyball game last Monday. Who knew I could hit a ball and it goes where I want it? Cool.

Went to watch Pao's pageant last Thursday. Stupid thing started out way too late for poor ol' Cindy (cinderella, i.e. me) so I didn't get to watch it til the end. Sad to say, Pao didn't win.

Spent all week stressing over Kipper, my dead, dissected frog. Gulay...it smells soooo gross. But if it weren't for the icky smell, I'm actually enjoying skinning and slicing dead things open . Sounds sick, ne? Ha. Get used to it.

We got kicked off our Bench all week too, because of the Eco Bazarre of the HS. Hung out at Colayco instead, which is the next best thing.

Things with Ran-Ai aren't going very well.

But what the hey, it's a Saturday. I'm off to spend the day in bed, with my DNAngel CD's.

Buhbye.

cast a spell?

February 19, 2005
Ouch.
POSTED AT 04:57 AM

"I can't try to replace the one you like for someone else. Like Niwa-kun for example. I won't be happy that way....." - Harada Risa, DNAngel

I don't like Risa very much but.....Amen to this line. How right you are.

cast a spell?

February 20, 2005
The poet in me lives...
POSTED AT 03:01 AM

Hidden
-endymion-

‘Stars are lovely tonight’
You say
I watch you from
the corner of my eye

I knew it.

‘it’s her isn’t it’ I say
in exasperation

Words were no longer needed
The hurt is painted on your face
Like acrylic on canvas
Abstract
Undefinable
Yet so real

I held your hand in comfort
Not knowing what else to do
A wounded heart
Is more difficult to nurse
Than a severed neck

Yes. It hurts doesn’t it?
When a heart bleeds in silence
Suffers in secret

I should know
For my heart has bled
and suffered all it can for you


A/N: Drama mode. Don’t mind me. He just spent most of his time talking to me about her, no biggie.


Sounds: Nashville Skyline - Dishwalla

2 were spellbound

February 21, 2005
hey girl.
POSTED AT 02:18 PM

is this how girls really are? hmm

when a GIRL is quiet,
millions of things
are running in her mind.
[x] yep

when a GIRL is not arguing,
she is thinking deeply.
[x] uhhuh

when a GIRL looks at yu
with eyes full of questions,
she is wndering
hw long u'll be around.
[x] err no..when she looks at u with questioning eyes, she is suspicious. :D

when a GIRL answers,
"i'm fine";
after a few seconds,
she isn't at all fine.
[x] depends

when a GIRL stares at u,
she is wondering
why u're lying.
[x] hahaha. yes, esp. when the stare is coupled by raised eyebrows

when a GIRL lays on your chest,
she is wishing for u
to be hers forever.
[x] she does this because...we're tired and no wall is available. ur chest would have to do.

when a GIRL calls u everyday,
she is seeking for your attention.
[x] this girl needs a social life.

when a GIRL wants to see u everyday,
she wants to be pampered.
[x] when a GIRL wants to see u everyday, she is clingy and annoying.

when a GIRL sms u everyday,
she wants u to reply at least once.
[x] when a GIRL sms u everyday, may 24/7 sha.

when a GIRL says i love u,
she means it.
[x] correct.

when a GIRL says that
she can't live without u,
she has made up her mind
that u're her future.
[x] when a GIRL says that
she can't live without u, she is demented

when a GIRL says i miss you,
no one in this world can miss you
more than that.
[x] i guess?

...

hay nako. people love stereotypes talaga.
Sounds: Counting Blue Cars - Dishwalla

2 were spellbound

February 25, 2005
When In Doubt, Rant.
POSTED AT 03:14 AM

It’s possible to die of exhaustion, right..?

It’s the last grading period. Finals. After this is the moment of truth, the REAL Judgment Day. We’re about to find out if we’re going to progress into second year of Nursing or if we’re going to be kicked to the curb.

Been busy with all the work the professors have swamped us with. In fact, I haven’t been online much for the past week, because of it. Imagine me, resisting the call of the net, just so I can study. What the hell is wrong with the world?!

This week’s epiphany: Taking chemistry and zoology quizzes is very much like betting on a lottery. No matter how hard you think, you’d always end up closing your eyes and using good ‘ol eenymeenymyneemo to choose the answer. If you get it right, then hooray for you, you get a prize. If not, hope that you have better luck with the next round.

I’m working my ass off. I just hope it would be worth it. I’d chugged down enough coffee to last me a lifetime, just so I won’t fall asleep while I tried to make sense of the bonds formed between primary and secondary proteins, or if humans also had an adductor magnus in the thigh, as the frogs do. All this stress is doing WONDERS for my appearance *heavy sarcasm*. My eyebags are hanging down to my elbows. I’m starting to get ZITS, for crying out loud. I rarely get zits! It’s one of the rare good traits in me. And what’s worse, I think the hereditary poknats I got from my dad are starting to resurface. My hair’s falling out. This happens everytime I think too much and I get stressed out.

So it felt pretty darn great to just kick back and party last night. Yep, Februarians birthday celebration. Macky’s condo in Tomas Morato. Chief, Arvin, Lourdes and Dana chipped in and paid for a catering service to feed us all.

And that’s another entry. Ciao.

cast a spell?

February 25, 2005
Februarian Bash.
POSTED AT 03:15 AM

I didn’t really intend on going at first, but then Chief coerced me into it. I told him I didn’t know how to get there on my own. That I won’t be able to get home without someone else pointing out the directions. Aba, aba. He took care of everything. He picked me up at home at around 5:30 and then he enlisted Marlo to take me home later. To return the favor, I took his dissected frog Gordon home with me. I’d be the one to dispose of it.

Pao, Kaye and Marj weren’t able to make it, so it was only me, Gian and Arvin who stood as Sputnik representatives. Food was awesome though. Diegs and JR took care of the sounds, like they always do.

After the dinner, some played cards, some watched Blade in Mack’s room. Mela, Gie and I were in the balcony. Mela played the piano, Gie was on guitar and I did the singing. After that we joined our classmates in the lobby. Even Mommy G (our class adviser Mrs. Garcia) was there, with his husband and Mrs. Abboy (who we fondly call Daddy G and Tita G respectively). Good thing too, ‘coz some of them wanted to smoke and drink. Mommy G didn’t mind us drinking, almost all of us were of age anyway, but she absolutely abhorred smokers (one thing we shared in common). A little later, Diegs switched the sound system and dimmed the lights. Siyempre, sayawan ang kasunod nun. At around eleven, Marlo rounded up the people who were hitching a ride with him, since uuwi din sha sa Cavite. Kind of early for me, but who was I to complain. We dropped by Starbucks for some coffee before heading on home.

Generally, I had a good time. I’m really starting to like my classmates.

But now, fun’s over. Starting tomorrow, all suffering starts once more as we near our Finals Week. I’m going to enjoy the little time I have to laze around.

Buhbye.

cast a spell?

February 25, 2005
Weh. Di nga?
POSTED AT 11:16 AM

Took this quiz. What Kind of Role do You Play In Your Barkada.

I got the Protector. I forgot where I got it, but while I was cleaning out the files in my folders, I found this result copied and pasted on Word. This is what it said:

You are the rock, the keystone of your friends and family.
They look to you for support and leadership.
You don't push for devotion or attention, but when the situation as dire, even the idols and exhibitionists will turn to you.
You are the trusted, the loved. You have the capacity to love more deeply than any other type and you are fiercely devoted to your friends and lovers.
Highly idealistic. Tends to sacrifice everything for a person or a cause.
You trust so deeply and so compassionately that a betrayal could shatter you.
Jealousy is your downfall, and sometimes you need to give people more space and not become so enamored.
Be careful who you place your trust into.
A protector's broken heart will never fully heal.



I don't know about the first part, but I think the part that said I am fiercely devoted and that I can love very deeply for both friends and family...I'd suppose that's true. And yeah, I am idealistic sometimes, much as I want to become a realist. And yes, I do tend to sacrifice a lot for people I care about.

Jealousy, is my downfall. LOL. True, true.

And that last sentence? Hmmm.....I'll have to get back to you on that.


cast a spell?

« 2005/01 | 2005/03 »





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Welcome, wanderer, to Fields of Elysion. You have stumbled across the journal of a seemingly normal yet demented writer slash future nurse. Feel free to browse around; you never know what you might find. This lovely layout was made by one of my newest online pals, alex, and it features my true anime love, Duo Maxwell.^.^ Don't forget to give his page a visit!
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Name: Chenyl Arrabelle
Profile:Name pronounced as she-nil, accent on the 2nd syllable. Libra. Thomasian. Otaku. Air elemental. Commonly referred to as Chen and mistaken for as a snob. Perpetually genki. Reader. Writer...wannabe. Spends hours on the net and in front of the TV. Dr. Love: Always the Doctor Never the Patient.
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Positive: The Star represents hopes and dreams and the optimism associated with realizing ones hearts desires. The Star is the initial spark of hope that arises from the dust when everything around us seems desolate and bleak. The Star is a renewal of faith in life and our Creator. It represents regeneration and renewal of all the good that life has to offer. The Star also represents the limitless possibilities that life has to offer, from our childish wishes to the high ideals we hold as adults. The Star is the guiding light we have been wishing on all of our lives in hopes of a better tomorrow. While similar to the motivation behind The Fool card, The Star differs in that we have hope beyond whatever our fears may bring. It represents a moment of peace, a reflection of light, or the wonderment of a child.

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